Sorry I'm Walkin' by You!

On a nice day in St Louis, as I was walking from the bus, an older gentleman crossed over the street to the sidewalk, apologizing for '"walking by you." I was surprised with the comment and told him it didn't matter to me because we are both people and just walking. I felt sad that a black man in this city apologizes that he is walking by me...a white woman when there is nothing that makes me better than anyone else, but made me remember as a white woman, I do have privelege, we do have divides here, and I am constantly aware of it.

He went on to say he was so upset because his girlfriend wouldn't stop talking and yelling at him and made him so mad, that he had to leave so he wouldn't hurt her. He talked about recently being released from 'the pen' and how he just wants to be happy.

I asked him what he thought would make him happy, and shared with him that I am not always happy...shared about life...that there's no good in me (as he stopped and looked me in the eyes), but that I have joy no matter what the circumstances....that God in me gives me joy and any goodness or good stuff in me is from Him. He says, "I'm saved"..and I talk to him about how I'm not into 'religion,' but real life joy, real life relationship with Jesus because of what HE did for me. He stopped, looked, and listened... this man who was much older than me that I look up to just because of his wisdom of age...my brother.